Monday, May 2, 2011

I Want An Arranged Marriage

A few years ago I visited with a dear friend in Nigeria that is the daughter of a former deceased President of the country.  Her father had been an extremely famous and wealthy man in Nigeria.  He was the first democratic elected President of the country but died before taking office.
During my visit to her home in Lagos, she was offered a marriage proposal by a extremely wealthy Nigerian business man. (Matter of fact he was close to becoming a billionaire)  With both her father and mother now deceased, the wealthy business man asked her to marry him so that she could maintain her lifestyle and elite social status in the country.  
To my surprise my friend told me that she wished her father was still alive to choose her husband for her.  I was simply perplexed by her position!!!!  This was an extremely brilliant and modern Harvard educated young woman that actually wanted her father to decide on her husband??!!! This same friend had openly organized for women’s rights around the world. Her mother was a famous activist that was killed for her fight for the rights of women.  YET she wanted her father to select a suitable husband???!!!???
I remember saying to my friend, “I really don’t understand.  Would you actually want your father to choose your mate? Do you want an arranged marriage?”
My friend looked at me and said, "Of course. I would absolutely trust my father with selecting my husband. I would much rather prefer that.” Then she proceeded to tell me her reasons why.  
My friend proudly stated, “My father loved me unconditionally and I know that he would only have chosen the right man for me that would love me they way that he did. I trust my father’s love for me.”
Her answer completely floored me.  But years later as I reflected on what she said I have finally come to an understanding of her position.  Now I too am finally ready for my Father to select my husband for me.
Let me be clear that you know that I am not talking about my biological or earthly father (unfortunately I wasn’t as lucky as my friend to have a Dad that demonstrated his love in my life).  
But what I mean is that I am finally ready for my eternal Father (God) to arrange my marriage for me and select my mate.

Dear Father God,
I thank you for the many blessings in my life.  Please forgive me of all of my transgressions, evil thoughts, and disobedient deeds.  Thank you for putting an overflow of love in my heart.  Thank you for giving me the desire to want to share my love with a mate.  Thank you for the gift of love and the desire to share that love.
I will no longer continue to lean to my own understanding.  I will absolutely trust your will for my life.  I will no longer try to make someone that I love be something that they are not.  I understand that we are all of a journey towards love and it is only you that can direct and change the hearts of man.  Teach me acceptance and forgiveness. 
Thank you for interfering in my life even when I don't want you to. Thank you for separating people from my life even when I want to hold-on tighter. Thank you for allowing me to feel pain--just enough to release and move towards changing my circumstances. Thank you for giving me revelation, deliverance, grace and protection.
Father God, I am so ready to follow your lead! I now recognize that I have been getting in my own way because of my ego, my insecurities and limited understanding.  I surrender my all to you. I am finally willing to accept YOUR choice of a man because I know that ultimately you know what is BEST for me.
Father, I thank you in advance for setting up my "Arranged Marriage." In Jesus' name I pray.     


Love,
Your Daughter LaTosha

20 comments:

The Poetry Diner Delivers.. said...

Arranged with a twist. I like it!

Kristen said...

I LOVE it! Funny thing is that God gave me an idea yesterday about a metaphorical approach to marriage...Stay tuned!

Great stuff. Thanks for sharing!

Michael Renee said...

I love it. Sister, thank you for checking in on my blog, 18 months to the altar. I am now following you and will look to you to inspire me as I continue my journey.

I too have prayed to my heavenly father to arrange marriage for me. I subscribe to the belief that faith without work will yield nothing. I just hope I'm on the right path.

I'll be back this weekend. I wish you blessings and success!

Anne said...

I have a friend who has done this arranged marriage...and they are okay now..

Jackie H. said...

Hey LaTosha!!! It was great meeting you today. Thanks for stopping by my blog! I love your blog too:) I look forward to seeing you at the retreat next month

La'Tonya Richardson said...

This post was absolutely beautiful. I have for daughters, one of which will soon be 22. I think your attitude is perfect!

Thanks for stopping by my blog, I'm now following you as well.

Wendy Irene said...

Sending you positive thoughts for great love in your life! I think prayer is incredibly powerful. Thank you so much for your sweet comment today. The book changed me! If you decide to read it, let me know :) Have a beautiful day!

Jackie H. said...

@Michael Renee, why haven't you blogged lately? What's going in your 18 months? I like the concept of your blog:)

Nicole Blean said...

I love your blog, LaTosha! I almost cried reading your postings because I have finally gotten to that point, too, where I have given it up to the Lord to find the right match for me. Thank you for your postive words. We ladies need to band together while we wait on God and expect His best!

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